Witnessing a conflict between colleagues: how to react?

A workplace conflict between colleagues happens more often than you think. When several personalities, experiences and ways of working meet, it is normal for disagreements to arise: on the distribution of tasks, working methods or even recognition. Good news: a conflict doesn't have to be a failure. Well managed, it can become an opportunity to improve communication and strengthen the collective.

The numbers speak for themselves : 2/3 of employees say they are confronted with it, with an average of 3 hours per week spent managing or experiencing tense situations, that is, 20 days per year (source: OpinionWay for the coaching firm All Leaders Initiative and the support of the consulting firm Topics). Behind these situations, the challenges are concrete: social climate, employee well-being, and collective performance.

Understanding workplace conflict between colleagues

One Workplace conflict between colleagues, it's simply a situation where two people (or more) disagree. This may concern the way in which a task is carried out, differences in priorities, or even unexpressed expectations. Contrary to popular belief, this is not necessarily negative: disagreement is part of the life of a team and can even be a source of innovation if you know how to approach it.

The most common causes

In most cases, a conflict arises from small discrepancies that accumulate. Some of the most common triggers include:

• Working methods (e.g. one colleague prefers to plan, the other acts urgently);
• The goals (one person aims for speed, the other for quality);
• Values or opinions (different visions of what is “well done”);
• Recognition (feeling that their efforts are not seen or valued);
• Communication (a misinterpreted email or a tone considered dry).

One classic example of a conflict between two colleagues : one feels that they are carrying more workload than the other, which generates frustration and resentment.

The impact on the team and the company

If nothing is done, the conflict does not remain isolated. It can:

• Weigh on the general atmosphere;
• Generate stress Or of the demotivation ;
• Slow down collective projects.

In other words, mismanaging a conflict also means impacting the performance of the entire team. So the key is to understand these situations without demonizing them : they are natural, but must be accompanied to become constructive.

Identify the signs of a conflict between colleagues

One Conflict between colleagues doesn't always start with loud voices. Very often, tensions build up gently, almost imperceptibly, before they escalate. Know how to recognize these Weak signals is essential to act early and prevent the situation from escalating.

The signals to observe

• Body language : fleeing glances, sighs, sudden gestures;
• The tone and the way of speaking : ironic remarks, loud voices or, on the contrary, unusual silence;
• Remote control : avoid direct exchanges, avoid collective discussions;
• Productivity is falling : delays, loss of concentration, lack of motivation.

When the ambiance speaks for itself

An individual conflict can quickly spill over into the whole collective. A decrease in motivation in a team, a more tense atmosphere, or even an increase in Turnover are often a sign that an unresolved disagreement is contaminating the work environment.

Why act early?

The longer a conflict lasts, the more it gets crystallizes and is becoming difficult to solve. Conversely, rapid intervention often defuses the situation with simple solutions, before the frustrations turn into blockages.

In short: identify early the signals of a workplace conflict between colleaguesis about giving the team a chance to turn tension into a constructive discussion.

Concrete examples of conflicts between two colleagues

There's nothing like concrete cases to understand how a workplace conflict between colleagues may be born. Here are three common situations experienced in organizations:

1. The distribution of tasks

An employee feels that they are carrying a heavier workload than their colleague. The result: frustration, loss of trust and daily tensions.

Exit key : to clarify the distribution of missions together and to recognize the efforts of each.

2. Working methods

One prefers to plan and follow specific processes, while the other advances more spontaneously, “in an emergency”. The two styles oppose each other and create misunderstandings.

Exit key : recognize the value of both approaches and find a balance (e.g. global planning + ad hoc flexibility).

3. Recognition

A colleague feels invisible: his ideas are seldom taken up, his successes rarely highlighted. The other, more visible to the manager, naturally receives more attention. From there is born a Conflict between two colleagues based on a need for recognition.

Exit key : establish regular feedback and value everyone's contributions, not only the most visible ones.

These examples show that a conflict, in essence, rarely starts from a major incompatibility but rather from small daily differences. These are useful signals for the collective: they remind us that communication, equity and recognition are the best allies of cooperation.

A small disagreement can, if not managed, become a collective problem.

How to react in the face of a conflict between colleagues?

Witnessing or managing a workplace conflict between colleagues is never easy. The temptation may be to “let it go”, hoping that things will work out by themselves... but that's rarely the case. The longer you wait, the more disagreement sets in. The good news is that there are simple actions to intervene effectively and with kindness.

When to use a third party

Some cases require formal intervention: inappropriate comments, discriminatory behaviors, verbal or psychological violence. In these situations, it is essential to Call on HR or the direct manager, because the company has a legal obligation to protect its employees (article L.4121-1 of the Labor Code).

Adopting the right posture as a witness

When the conflict is not serious, everyone can contribute to the healing process:

• Choosing a neutral setting : avoid busy corridors or meetings, prefer a quiet place;
• Listen to each part separately : to give everyone the opportunity to express their feelings without being interrupted;
• Encourage a constructive encounter : if both colleagues are open to it, organizing a tripartite exchange can help to find common ground;
• Remain neutral : do not “take sides”, but rather encourage mutual understanding.

Turning conflict into opportunity

One Conflict between two colleagues can also be an opportunity to review certain practices: review an organization, clarify roles, or improve internal communication. In other words, instead of only trying to “put out the fire”, we can use this energy to make the collective evolve positively.

Methods for resolving a conflict at work

When a Conflict between colleagues persists despite initial discussions, it is often useful to rely on structured methods. The objective is not to “decide” who is right or wrong, but to help people find common ground that benefits everyone — and the collective.

1. Mediation: putting dialogue back at the center

La mediation consists in involving a neutral person, internal or external, to facilitate exchanges. Her role? Create a climate of trust, filter tensions and help colleagues formulate their needs.

Advantage: the mediation often makes it possible to unblock fixed situations and to prevent the conflict from permanently degrading the working environment.

2. The DISC method: a simple and effective approach

The method DISC is based on the idea that everyone has a dominant communication style:

• D (Dominance) : results-oriented, direct, likes to decide.
• I (Influence) : communicative, enthusiastic, relational oriented.
• S (Stability) : attentive, cooperative, committed to harmony.
• C (Compliance) : rigorous, analytical, attentive to the rules.

By understanding these profiles, you can adapt the way you communicate and better defuse tensions. For example, when faced with a “D” profile, going straight to the point works better, while with an “S” profile, focusing on a reassuring and collaborative exchange will be more effective.

3. The compromise: finding a happy medium

In many cases, the way out of a crisis requires a compromises : everyone agrees to give in a bit so that the relationship can start again on a new basis. This is not a weakness, but a proof of professional maturity.

4. Informing and involving the collective

When a workplace conflict between colleagues had an impact on an entire team, it is recommended to bring the collective together. Objective: explain the decisions taken, share the readjusted operating rules and show that the situation is under control. This restores confidence and prevents rumours.

Preventing conflicts in the future

The best way to deal with a conflict at work is To act beforehand. Preventing means maintaining a positive climate, protecting the well-being of employees and supporting collective performance.

Encourage open communication

Encouraging regular, transparent, and constructive exchanges reduces misunderstandings before they become conflicts. A few simple actions:

• Establish regular team meetings to share progress and difficulties;
• Create a space where everyone can express their ideas or feelings without judgment.

Establishing clear rules

Clarifying roles, responsibilities, and goals helps avoid tensions associated with expectations that are not said or misunderstood. One clear frame builds trust and cooperation.

Train in DISC profiles and tension management

Raise awareness among teams about DISC method and good communication practices allow everyone to better understand their colleagues and to defuse tensions before they escalate.

Valuing recognition and successes

Recognition and encouragement are powerful remedies for the frustrations that can lead to conflicts. One regular positive feedback nourishes the motivation and commitment of all.

Act quickly when there are weak signals

Even some Weak signals (reduced motivation, estrangement, irritability) must be taken into account. Acting early prevents escalation and maintains a serene and collaborative work environment.

Transforming conflicts into levers of collective performance

Conflicts between colleagues are inevitable, but they are not inevitable. Well managed, they can become opportunities for improvement, cohesion and performance. Acting early, understanding the underlying issues, and using the right methods can defuse tensions and strengthen the collective.

At Qualisocial, we believe that every conflict is an opportunity to grow together. That is why we offer a training in corporate conflict management, designed to help your teams:

• Identify weak signals and understand the root causes of tensions;
• Apply concrete methods to defuse conflicts, such as mediation or the DISC method;
• Foster a climate of trust, respect and collaboration within the team.

This training is adapted to your specific needs, whether it is to prevent psychosocial risks, to support a team in difficulty or strengthen the cohesion of a collective. It is led by experts in quality of life at work, who will guide you through

Do you want to support your managers or teams in managing conflicts at work?